System Time: 8:53 AM
..waahaha. according to my other officemates, Ma'am V's nerves had been on the edge since Friday. i think we're supposed to submit Reference forms and Reports on that day and many of the said forms/reports had numerous errors. (including mine) the SAs were pressured by Ma'am V, and in turn, the programmers were pressured by the SAs to finish them. they stayed (SAs and programmers) until late Friday evening, and even went to work the next day. they only got to contact Koji..they couldn't get a hold on chipper.. whereas i was probably wallowing away in Sagada at that moment. couldn't help but feel a little bit guilty and incompetent because Vic (one of the SAs) said that Jhoneil (my SA) said that he had a difficult time modifying some of my codes. Jhoneil still hasn't shown up today, so i still have no IDEA what sort of changes do i have to do on my past Forms.

System Time: 4:44 PM
nice time, ei?

System Time: 6:16 PM
..bye all!

My blog last April 30, 2003:

System Time: 9:17 AM
"When you really want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it." -- The Alchemist

I'm going to Sagada!!! yeHey! my family's going to Isabela, and from there we're going to go to Sagada via Banaue.. we're leaving tomorrow morning.

System Time: 11:00 AM
...yey! new mp3s.. chipper and kuya aLLan brought cds..
currently listening to Cheeky girls! bwahaha! *dances the Cheeky dans LOL*

System Time: 11:16 AM
..waahh i'm so excited i could hardly concentrate on work.. who could think of ByVal and ByRef parameters when thoughts of Sagada keep entering my mind.. lolz!

System Time: 5:59 PM
..will meet eboy later at Megamall.. no net here at the office so i'll just post this blog at home.. bye all!

each time i attend weddings.. i feel a little envious at the newly married couple.. i don't really want to get married yet, but i want the "idea" of it.. that you'll be able to plan for it.. choose your motif, your cake, your gown, your flowers, the songs.. lolz.. hay. and cherry, my college kabarkada who got married this morning, looked really happy. i really hope, with all sincerity that everything goes well for them.

i miss being with momi. maybe it's the after effect of attending a wedding. hay. actually, everytime i see a couple, i feel so frustrated with our situation. i mean, why does everything in my life have to have some sort of complication.. why can't i love someone who lived right next to our house.. or in LUZON for that matter.. >_< it's so unfair. but that's love, i guess. it tests you until you've proven yourself worthy for it.

..have been busy at the office programming the new form..it's a freaking difficult one, my deadline's on tuesday and i have this awful panicky feeling in my chest every time i wake up.. that it's one day less 'til tuesday. wonder how i'll feel when it IS tuesday. perhaps i'll have a heart attack and die, so that i won't need to finish it. LOL. tough luck.

wanna watch What A Girl Wants tomorrow.. erlyn watched it and said that it was good.. but ate chary had already seen it and wants to watch Phonebooth instead. maybe i could convince her to watch it again. HEHE.

..hmm.. think i'm getting dizzy. was supposed to attend another event this night.. jacq, jeff and anna's birthday celebration (ISM classmates).. was too damn lazy to get out of the house after arriving from the wedding.. just watched Click LOL! katawa si Icko, hehe.

i'll try going to sleep now.. bye guys! *big hug for everyone who took time out from their busy scheds to read my blog. how sweet.*

System Time: 9:00 AM
..gud mawnin :) presently enjoying Jars of Clay's version of I Could Sing of your Love forever.. oh i feel like dancing.. it's foolishness i know, but when the world has seen the light, they will dance with joy like we're dancing now..

System Time: 9:49 AM
...had to do some additional modifications.. just hate it when they keep on changing the specs.. it's mainly the client's fault.. gaah.

..will continue reading Anne of Green Gables.. it doesn't make me sleepy anymore.. hehe.. it's quite entertaining actually.. i find Anne amusing with her big words and her wild imagination..

System Time: 10:50 AM
..huhuhu.. possibility of going to Sagada on May 1 looks dismal.. waah. *wapaks Jep n cHe* haaaaaaaaaaay. bad trip.

System Time: 3:52 PM
..waaahh i wanna go somewhere on May 1.. ANYwhere that entails me to be in a bus at least 4 hours, or in a ferry.. or in an airplane.. grrr. kainish.

System Time: 3:57 PM
..think i'm getting dizzy.. >_<

System Time: 4:58 PM
..had free food again.. it's Ma'am doc's birthday today kaya nagpakain siya..meh pancit and ice cream.. (yum²) lessened my dizziness.. maybe because i was hungry before.. lolz..
..been convincing my officemates to go to Cebu with me.. waahaha. asa puh ko. i really want to go but i don't want to go by myself..

System Time: 5:05 PM
..maybe if i imagine myself in cebu hard enough, it'll become real.. (*_*)

System Time: 6:05 PM
..woah.. given a difficult form.. it's due on the 29th..

will log out now.. bye!

System Time: 9:08 AM
..still have nothing to do.. but i did download some more stuff bout writing a novel.. i need ALL the help i could get. i'm stuck on my 6th page..

...dinner last night with cherry and other friends went fine.. finally met her soon-to-be-husband, willy.. (wataname) their wedding's happening this saturday and i still have nothing to wear.. hmm..

System Time: 9:59 AM
..just waiting for break time.. ate ging's going back to Indonesia today.. i'll be roommate-less again.. though i haven't been sleeping in my room for the past few weeks.. it's too fucking hot, even at night.. i sleep at my parent's room, on the couch..

System Time: 5:42 PM
..bilis talaga ng oras pag meh ginagawa.. was given additional specs so i had to revise 7 forms..am now finished ( i think, hehe)..
i wanna go home nuuh.. hmm.. bakit kayuhh..
sek-wet! :bleh

bye all!

System Time: 8:33 AM
... hay. monday. monday sucks. but this particular monday sucks even more because it happened after a 4 day break. katamad. kaantok. basta.. kaka. lol.

..uyy.. ipismeyt badz was able to buy me a Davao shirt. yehey! will be included in my t-shirt collection of philippine provinces hehe. i've already got cebu,(syempre hehe) bacolod, boracay, iloilo, etc.

..presently listening to old collective soul songs.. maybe could infuse some energy into my super-lazy-body.

System Time: 10:03 AM
...break taym.. but nobody's standing up.. gaah. even in the training room, everybody's still inside.. waah.

..currently listening to Pangako.. (yung keh ogie at manilyn, lol) .. have copied it from someone else's shared folder hehe..

System Time: 10:34 AM
..currently listening to Lenny Kravitz - Fly Away..
..i want to get away.. i want to fly awaaayyy.. yeahhh yeah yeahhhhhh
EKK. putol! badtrip naman tong nacopya ko. lol. serves me right for looking at other people's computer. hehe.

/me balik Collective Soul

..uyyy Heavy. reminds me of my old site. my gallery has this song's intro as it's background.
*appreciates stereo headphones*

i had a Collective Soul phase during my senior year in HS. still like them, but i don't listen to them as much as i did when i was in HS. when i say phase, it means that ALL i listened to was that band. that's why i easily recall when a certain song was released.. cause i could always relate the song to memories/events that happened simultaneous to when that song was popular. that's music for me. it's my bestfriend, sympathizing when i'm down.. celebrating with me when i'm happy.. it calms me when i feel suicidal..(LOL! totoo!).. and it taught me how to listen, to appreciate the small details.. to not take things for granted.. to enjoy the present, but to not forget the past. If the boy from the Alchemist learned a lot from the Desert, music has been my teacher, my guide. i could explain further, but then the gratification of understanding what i've just said would lessen. sometimes i would stop anything that i'm doing and just listen to a song that i love and allow the song to embrace me with its melody. that's also the reason why i have such a high respect for musicians.. 'cause they could touch people's lives without actually interacting with them. perhaps that's their Personal Legend. hope i too could realize what mine is.

System Time: 11:37 AM
..punta daw kami Sagada! (kami nila mel, che, plus ibang chatmeyts) sana naman matuloy nuuuhh.. no specific date yet.. pero plan is sa May 1.. siguro aabsent na lang ako sa May 2. (thursday kasi ang May 1)

System Time: 1:40 PM
..demmit. hintay na naman ako ng break taym. la magaaaaawaaaaaaaa. been re-opening some soft copies of books i have in my local.. lahat puro kaantok. trying to read Anne of Green Gables.. but once i start reading it, i feel my eyes closing.. waah di pwede.. got-to stay aweeeyk. @_@
..maybe my mp3list has got something to do with my feeling drowsy.. i have some songs from my "mainstream pop music" folder.. currently listening to Twisted by Keith Sweat..
you know, you want my love.. you've got me twisted over you.. i know i got what you need.. so what you wanna do..

System Time: 4:35 PM
..haba ng blog ko pag la ko ginagawa sa ofis! lol! kung ano ano puh sinasabi ko hehe. onguh pala.. i'll be going to Makati later.. i'm gonna be having dinner with cherry and other pre-com kabarkada.. si cherry yung ikakasal,..di na tuloy yung bridal shower.. dinner na lng daw.. sabi ko nguh sa mga kabarkada ko.. ndi ako papayag na dinner lang pag ako na ang ikakasal hehe.. dapat meh bridal shower talaga ako! lol! wehehe. tagal puh nun.

System Time: 4:46 PM
..hay.. nagpapakabait na talaga ako. i mean, umiiwas na ako sa mga tukso sa paligid..LoL! basta, ate cha.. you're gonna be so proud of me..HEHE! syempre, para keh momi toh.. pero nakng naman.. sumulat ka na! *wapaks* waah, yung promise mo saken.. don't forget ^_^

System Time: 5:27 PM
.. now listening to my OPM folder.. gotta have new mp3s na.. hay.. getting tired listening to the same old stuff especially my alternative and acoustic list.. if only i had a CD-RW at home.. i'd copy all my p3s their and bring it here.. but since ala.. pwede na toh kesa sa wala..
..ikaw ang tunay na ligaya tanging ikaw sinta.. umaga't hapon kahit magdamag tanging ikaw sinta.. hindi magsasawa.. sa piling mooo uuwoohhh.. LOL!

System Time: 5:58 PM
yehey. laaast 2 minutes! 2 minutes more and i'll have internet access to post this blog... 2 minutes more and i'll log out and meet Ten² at the MRT station.. woohoo!

System Time: 5:59 PM
1 minute to go!
bye all!

System Time: 11:11 AM
..tongueeenahh.. tagal ng 6 pm. waah.bakasyon na bakasyon nuh ako. actually, la kami specific na pupuntahan ng family ko.. di kami tuloy sa Sagada huhuh.. ayaw ni mommy.. ayaw nilang bumiyahe papuntang north.. sabi ni daddy overnight na lang daw kami sa beach (malamang sa Quezon lang) or puntang Tagaytay.. basta kung san medyo malamig-lamig.. sobrang INIT khet sa bundok namen! lol! yung mga itik nga namin dun sa Paenaan e wawa, mga 15 na daw namamatay :( ..feeling ni daddy dhel sa init daw, nagkakaheat stroke sila..

...di ko parin tapos yung The Alchemist.. kagabi kasi nagchat lang ako di ko man lang nabuksan tong libro... ngayon gusto ko ngang basahin kaya lng tag 15 mins lang break taym.. baka nga mamayang lunch magbasa na lang ako, la naman akong ganang kumain.. haaay..

...sabi sa book, lahat ng tao meh Personal Legend, sabi nga dun, ...to realize one's destiny is a person's only obligation.. ano kaya personal legend ko,.. maybe yung tapusin ang lahat ng sinimulan ko.. ganon kasi ako.. puro simula.. pero di ko tinutuloy.. baka personal legend ko tong novel ko LOL!.. kasi pag natapos ko talaga toh, shet.. wow na para saken.. khet di siya mapublish or something like that.. yung feeling lang na nakatapos ako ng libro eh sobrang saya na..

System Time: 6:33 PM
nyek andito puh ko opis. bbay!

System Time: 9:36 AM
..wasn't able to post my blog yesterday.. dunno what's wrong with the company's internet connection last night but the blogger site just wouldn't load.. anywayz, i'll try again later at lunch time..

..been reading The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho.. i'm still halfway through but i've already learned soo much.. 'bout faith, omens, dreams.. grabe.. super nice.. my sister bought this book ages ago and it's just this morning that i picked it up and read it.. even has some humor in it.. it's not that thick a book.. figured i could finish it later..

System Time: 5:21 PM
..been trying to continue my novel.. hay.. so i read my logs again with pc.. it still has the same effect for me.. he's like a ghost that keeps on haunting my soul.. if i were to pick one person in the entire world to be with.. i'd pick him. life's unfair... pero ganon talaga.. you can't have everything.. i try not to dwell on the what-ifs.. maloloka ka lang.. sabi nga sa The Alchemist,
"don't live in either your past or your future.. because life is the moment we're living right now.."

System Time: 5:41 PM
..it's weird that we always have to be reminded of our blessings... when something negative happens to us, we focus on that and lose vision of the things that are more important in life..

*wapaks sarili* ano buh toh. hehe.

but seriously.. sabi nga nila.. count your blessings, dibuh?.. thank God i have my family.. TG they're healthy hehe.. especially my parents.. TG for my friends, my job.. my headphones so that i could listen to my mp3s.. lol! and TG for my choco mallows to which i've been staring at for the past hour thinking i would enjoy eating it after dinner while watching DVDs at our 43" TV.. TG that my parents' room has airconditioning so that i could sleep without feeling uncomfortable because of the summer heat.. and TG for my sisters, though we're not the showy type.. i know that they love me and care for me, just as deeply as i love them.. and TG for our pet bird, mai-mai.. even if she can't speak a single english word, at least she knows how to say "tao po" and "kumain ka na?" hehe!!!

tama na tohh.. di ko na carry LoL! bye all!

my blog yesterday, April 14, 2003:
System Time: 2:56 PM
..yep, i'm not doing anything hehe. have finished ALL of my assigned forms.. so i'm trying to continue my logs-novel.. yahh.. still attempting to write that one.. thought i've forgotten about it, noh? it's always been on the back of my mind, but i've been really busy and haven't had the time to actually sit and write something.. i even read some articles like "How to Finish your novel", "What Makes a Story a Good Story", etc., etc.. one of the tips that i've gathered is for me to always have a notebook (specific only for my novel) with me so that i could jot down any ideas that i might have..
... still have some "outlining" to do.. brb

System Time: 5:54 PM
...Yehey nagsweldo! yehey meh incentive na kami dun! yehey lapit na uwian! yehey bibili ako new blouse (hehe) yehey ako lang mag-isa! (eh?) ..kainish mga kapatid ko, ayaw akong samahan huhuhu.. gusto ko kasi meh kasama pag bibili ako ng bagay na di puh ko sure kung anong itsura nya exactly.. pag mga tipong ilang beses ko na nakita and stuff, okey lng saken pero yung gagawin ko mamaya na maghahanap puh lang ng blouse, gusto ko meh kasama sana.. kaya lng ayaw nila waah. pero oks lng.. hintay ko lang 6 para mapost ko na toh.. 6 pm puh magkakainternet e.. hahay.. sige.. babayu!

System Time: 8:19 AM

...was so busy yesterday that i couldn't even attempt to write a blog..

..last night after work, i was able to try riding in the new MRT (it's called MegaTren.. corny).. it's okay.. more spacious than the present MRT.. but even if the ride took less than 5 minutes, (from cubao to santolan) i had a hard time getting a fx from santolan.. alanganin kasi.. tas siningil puh ako ng 15 bucks.. nYek. mas mahal magiging pamasahe ko from cubao.. libre puh kahapon sa MRT, pero yung magiging fare daw 12 bucks.. mamahal ako ng 7 pesos.. tas hirap puh sumakay pagbaba sa MRT, tas haba puh ng lalakarin from the old MRT to the new one.. eh fx sa cubao papuntang cogeo 20 bucks lang.. siguro kung pupunta lang akong sta.lucia mas okey mag MRT kasi ang bilis..

hu-hum..

..will start working on my form at 9 am.. still feel groggy.. stayed up late 'cause i was able to finish reading X-Men 2 (novelization based on the screenplay).. ganda nya.. galing kasi imagination ko hehe.. can't wait for the movie..

..will meet my pre-com friends later.. we're planning a briday shower for our friend, cherry.. she's going to be married on the 26th.. nyek..watdapak would i wear on her wedding? will hafto find a dress for that.. me in a dress? double nyek. -_-

System Time: 11:06 AM
..yey! finished my form..haven't tested it yet, though.. will make my test data later..

System Time: 1:09 PM
..hay keh sarap. sekwet ko na lang kung ano yun... :þ

System Time: 6:02 PM
..uy bilis ng oras.. babay!

System Time: 1:44 PM
...already finished my form.. its deadline is still on Thursday.. (nyeh).. thinking of handing it over, but it still needs to be standardized.. we've been given some new programming standards and some of my past codes were affected.. will do them later.. (read: pag sinapag ako)

...have already decided not to join ANY networking scheme.. being an employee is NOT so bad, you know.. my dad was able to bring us up by being one..i mean, we were able to go to private schools, buy us stuff we need.. etc., etc.. we're not rich but we've managed.. like my dad said, installment's the KEY, a loan..payable for a certain # of years.. your salary gets higher but the installment price doesn't.. so it gets easier.. i'll still be able to own a house, a car, etc.. my mind's full of plans.. business plans.. but i really need the capital for it.. so i kinda small-scaled my plans, made them more feasible..

System Time: 3:25 PM
.. had a meeting (useless one if i may add).. at least killed some of my pagpapanggap time..

System Time: 4:36 PM
..have been renaming my mp3 files.. (wow, ano?).. great time killer HEHE.. searching for shared mp3 files at our network and copying those that i like.. great finds: Tattooed on my Mind, Deep, Passenger seat, plus a lot of OPM songs.. hehe ..

System Time: 5:01 PM
..been reading past blogs again.. gwabe.. la na sa buhay ko si Pangs.. he became one of those "oh-yeah-i-know-him" kinda person, instead of being on the friends list.. it's partly my fault i guess, but he stopped calling me and i couldn't bring myself to call him.. i mean, watdapak would i say.. "ei, hello.. promises are meant to be broken, uh?".. plus i got really affected (HAHA, oo noh) when i found out he has a thing for this chatter.. so i decided, there and then.. that i've had enough of IRC people.. logged on once in a while but only talked to people whom i previously knew, never made an effort to get familiar with new chatters..
...si PC.. hay. totally different story. -_-

*yanks myself back to reality*

hafto stop thinking of the "what ifs".. promised myself to behave for momi.. i'm not doing anything wrong, anywayz.. just thinking..

..speaking of momi.. tried mailing my letter to him this morning.. freaking 7-11 didn't have any local stamps.. wanted to tell them "magsara na kayo!" but restrained myself and just plastered a smile in my face and said "ahh ok" .. i'll try later at a 7-11 in masinag..meaning bababa puh ako dun pag uwi? bukas na lng kaya.. hmm..)

..uy, just remembered that the new MRT is already open.. hmm.. from santolan to cubao.. try ko buh.. baka mahirapan ako pagdating ko sa santolan.. hmm.. the ride's still free 'til today.. hmmmm..

System Time: 6:01 PM
..yesss uwian na.. meh internet na rin.. our connection got restricted to these times.. before 8 am, 12-1pm and 6pm onwards.. gaah.. anywayz.. any kinda connection is good.. as long as i could post my blogs..
will post this blog now,, bye!

labyumomi!

wrote a letter for momi today.. hope i'll be able to mail it tomorrow.. yeah.. yeah, kami ulit..he also said that i should refrain myself from posting our story in my blog.. nasha-shy na ata siya e.. our love story is too exposed na raw hehe..

...my pre-com friends slept over last friday night in our house.. was really good to see them and do our usual cosmo talk (hehe).. the next day, we went to our farm-liit and i showed off our piglets (1 week old!) and the itiks.. dami pictures, hope i'll be able to ask erlyn for a copy so that i could scan them.. anywayz.. all is well, had a good weekend inspite of some UNFORTUNATE incidents that have happened. have programmed it in my mind as NEGLIGIBLE and INSIGNIFICANT happening in my life.. in short, i don't give a fuck.

momi.. kwento ko sayo yan pag nagkausap ulit tayo..has nothing to do 'bout us.. just some JERK i met in my life whom i wish i never did.. but in the mean time.. this song is for you. (ang-swit-ko lolz)

Everything
Lifehouse

find me here
speak to me
i want to feel you
i need to hear you
you are the light
that is leading me
to the place where
i find peace again
you are the strength
that keeps me walking
you are the hope
that keeps me trusting
you are the life to my soul
you are my purpose
you are everything

and how can i
stand here with you
and not be moved by you
would you tell me
how could it be
any better than this

you calm the storms
you give me rest
you hold me in your hands
you won't let me fall
you still my heart
and you take my breath away
would you take me in
would you take me deeper now
'cause you're all i want
you are all i need
you are everything
everything

always yours, geri

My blog yesterday, April 1, 2003

System Time: 3:39 PM
...woah.. new month already? so MUCH stuff has happened.. don't know where to start my story..
have already been programming (seriously hehe) for the project.. most of the forms were only alloted a day/two to program .. am so happy 'cause i finished my first form (its deadline is today)..

...my kabarkada died last Saturday -_- ,.. she's my friend when i was in St.scho.. am not that very close to her, but we never had a misunderstanding or something like that.. whenever we see each other, we make kamusta and talk 'bout stuff happening in our lives.. i used to see her often when i was assigned in Miriam College where she used to study.. she died on a car accident.. actually,.. it's still not sinking in that she's really dead.. hay.. will go to her wake again after work..

..on other slightly happy news.. was able to talk to momi last sunday.. kainish lang.. 'cause i didn't realize that i wasn't saving my logs in IRC.. la tuloy ako.. grrr.. hay.. 'cause sometimes i read our logs when i want to cheer myself up.. just so i would know that he really exists and not just a figment of my imagination...

..will test my program again.... later

System Time: 5:04 PM
..already submitted my form and received another one today... deadline's tomorrow.. hay.. at least i got an early start..
gtg now bye!

Weak

I don't know what it is that you've done to me
But it's caused me to act in such a crazy way
Whatever it is that you do when you do what you do to me
It's a feeling that I want to stay

Now my heart starts beating triple time
With thoughts of loving you on my mind
I can't figure out just what to do
When the problem here is you

I get so weak in the knees
I can hardly speak
I lose all control
It's something comes over me
In a daze, it is so amazing
It's not a phase, I want you to stay with me
By my side, I swallow my pride
Your love is so sweet, it knocks me right off my feet
Can't explain why your love just makes me weak

Time after time after time I tried to fight it
But your love is strong
It keeps me holdin' on
Resistance is down when you're around my ba-a-by
In my condition, I don't want to be alone

I get so weak
Blood starts racing through my veins (I get so weak)
Ooh, it's something I can't explain (I get so weak)
Something 'bout the way you do
The things you do...
Knocks me right (off my feet)
Can't explain why your love just makes me weak

I try hard to fight it
No way can I deny it
You're love is so sweet
Knocks me right off my feet

*sighs*

System Time: 11:24 AM
.. have been standardizing forms.. a bit boring but it's better than doing nothing.. only have one more form left so i'm delaying it a little so that i'll still have something to do later..

System Time: 3:29 PM
*yawns* so sleypi -_-

System Time: 5:57 PM
..discussed for a few minutes some modules we created to the SysAnalysts.. now just reading some past blogs.. hehe mali mali grammar ko kahiya LOL.. actually.. yung iba typo lang (excuses, excuses) .. hehe .. usually proof read my blogs before i post them.. kala ko siguro nung time na yun tama grammar ko haha..

will post this blog now, almost 6 pm.. bye all!

System Time: 4:41 PM
..woahhh.. late blog ei? have been struck by this quote: "When you're in some place.. be there!" .. hehe.. so i've been working my butt off (well.. my mind, then) since morning.. am just currently stuck with my code so i decided to have a break and blog..
..arrived home late last night.. my classmate brought us to some networking company... (me and eboy) gaaah.. even if i DID have the money to join (which i don't).. i totally suck at anything to do with selling stuff.. i'm a salesman's nightmare.. don't know how to sales talk people.. maybe it's because i don't give a f*ck on what other people think of me.. i don't know how to please them.. or make them happy.. my classmate was REALLY good.. i mean.. i don't believe in networking stuff ('cause i know they're really controversial cause some are illegal)..but through him, he made me actually THINK of joining.. you've probably heard of this one..company's called Forever Living.. (wataname uh) they sell Health products and you earn through sales and recruitment.. i gotta give it to them, they have an awesome marketing plan.. it's just too good to be true.. -_-

...hay.. gotta go back to work...

System Time: 5:50 PM
...grabeeeeeeeeeee! was working on this module the WHOLE day.. kept on having problems with my logic.. then it just struck me to change the WHOLE essence of my logic.. the alternative solution was soooo simple i wanted to punch myself for my inability to recognize it immediately.. gaaaH.. was doing the "arithmetic" way for almost 7 hours.. took me just 30 minutes to finish it with my "string" method.. gaaaah ulit *wapaks sarili*

hay. at least i finished it. thought i wouldn't.

System Time: 6:00 PM
..hehe *wapaks sarili ulit*

bye all! have a nice evening :)

labyumomi!

System Time: 9:07 AM
..gud mawnin! ok, i'm back in the office.. most of my workload have been given to Koji so i'm back doing the Report ttx stuff... have been absent at work since Thursday afternoon.. had a migraine.. which lasted 'till Friday.. so i've had a loong weekend.. basically spent it lying in bed while watching a few DVDs .. ok,ok.. not a few.. had my own movie marathon.. just some feel-good movies.. Legally Blonde, Maid in Manhattan, Get Over It.. Crazy/Beautiful (yeah, watched it AGAIN)..
..yesterday.. i went shopping with my sister.. bought some stuff i know i can't afford.. 2 blouses.. a body shop lotion.. undies.. lolz.. now my ATM account is bordering on zero balance.. gaah.. how am i going to survive this week! still 5 more days till payday.. waaahhh

System Time: 10:39 AM
..good thing there are a few holidays coming up.. like on April 9 (National Heroes Day).. holy week.. and May 1! hahaay.. wanna go somewhere in holy week.. if only i've got the money..

System Time: 11:24 AM
..started researching 'bout how much money i need.. for airfare, lodging etc..

System Time: 3:17 PM
..gaaahh.. tinigil ko na pagpapantasya kong makaalis! at wala pala talaga akong pera. demit chet.

sucks talaga -_-

..in between e-mailing harbie and ria.. have been doing some actual work.. my job sometimes entail me to do some encoding stuff.. to prepare my test data.. i'm already finished with that.. now i have to do the actual code.. waaahh.. i'm just so NOT in the mood today.. just really waiting for e-mails from ria and harbie.. haha..
..speaking of which.. I've got Mail!

System Time: 3:50 PM
..waahhh tagal ng 6 madirpakir!!! will meet Eboy and Prince at Galle after work..

System Time: 5:24 PM
..nyahhh!! weird!? uy muymuy! howdapak did u know bout my new site? ang weird kasi kaka email ko lang sayo.. as in ngayon lang.. tas ala lang.. decided to check my guestbook.. tas andun ka na pala.. don't remember telling you bout it.. dun lang sa e-mail ko sayo today meh nakalagay na URL.. anyway.. thanks for signing.. kala ko galit ka parin saken.. reply ka uh, wento!

System Time: 5:27 PM
..waaaaaaaaaaah parin. *wapaks sarili* babaw ko putek..
haayy.. reply ka uh! (oki, can't get over it puh e, sensya na lolz)

..hay.. eboy's stuck in her interview/test in makati.. will meet her later than our agreed time.. demit. gugutom nuh ko.. gusto ko ng.. japanis pud.. something raw.. LOL.. remembered this rex navarete file i heard.. "i'm craving for something new.. something unborn.. " lol! he was talking bout Balut..

System Time: 5:50 PM
..been giving free tech support to eboy via txt lolz.. differences between Property Let and Set, SQL statements.. good thing i have MSDN haha..

System Time: 5:54 PM
..di nuh ko mapakali.. will post this blog now..
babayy!

System Time: 9:56 AM
..ei.. notice the system time uh.. not my usual time.. ergo, was "busy".. actually, i still am.. but i got a few questions for Ma'am V before i start my module.. already finished a couple of TTX files and already modified my program to accommodate the new requirements.. the Date conversion module that i made needs to be modified.. new specs.. no big deal, really.. 'cause the more work i have, the happier i am..
..also have been talking to Ate cha through e-mail.. good luck ate cha in your upcoming admission tests.. kayang-kaya mo yan! (*two thumbs up*)

..already smoked 3 sticks today.. hmm.. gotta cut down my yosi intake..

..ay, didn't know that i could play a DVD on my PS2 even without a DVD remote..Ate joy, my officemate told me to just load the DVD and it would play, and it did! really good news 'cause now, i could watch a movie when i get home after work.. kasi our player is located in the living room and my mom watches the GMA Telebabad shows.. that means, nobody could change the channel till 9:30 pm! waahaha.. now i could watch whenever i want in my room.. watched Abandon and Swimfan last night.. was up till 'bout 12:30 am.. aaahh.. so that's why i feel so sleepy today.. well.. am usually sleepy but more so today.. hehe.. ei.. break time.. later..

System Time: 10:36 AM
..currently listening to PM Dawn..
I'd Die Without You

Is it my turn to wish you were lying here.
I tend to dream you when I'm not sleeping.
Is it my turn to fictionalize my world.
Or even imagine your emotions. Tell myself anything...
Is it my turn to hold you by your hands.
Tell you I love you and you not hear me...
Is it my turn to totally understand.
To watch you walk out of my life and not do a damn thing...

If I've to give away...
The feeling that I feel.
If I've to sacrifice...
Oh, whatever babe, whatever baby.
If I've to take apart...
All that I am...
Is there anything that I would not do,
'Cause inside I'd die without you...

Oh, I apologize for all the things I've done.
But now I'm underwater and I'm drowning...
Is it my turn to be the one to cry.
Isn't it amazing how some things just completely turn around...
So take every little piece of my heart...
So take every little piece of my soul...
So take every little piece of my mind...
'Cause if you're gone... inside...
I'd die without you...

depressing song, eh? -_-

System Time: 1:00 PM
.. think i my mood got affected by that freaking song.. haaaayy..

System Time: 6:15 PM
..babay!!!

System Time: 10:39 AM
... ei! just configured my outlook express.. (hapi hapi hehe).. can now receive mail in the office.. with a real-time response from me lolz.. just a drag to go home and find your inbox full.. kaiinggit.. 'cause some of my friends use their e-mail like it's a chat client or something.. hehe.. lagi tuloy ako huli magreply, or worse, AKO subject ng pang-aasar dhel la ko magawa.. huli naman kasi ako magreak hehe.. anywayz.. e-mail me at go_geri@hotmail.com .. save meeeee.. save me from the boredom of office work.. hehe..

System Time: 11:01 AM
..approached Ma'am Malou to show her the frmSelection assigned to me.. but she said i should first show it to our project manager Ma'am Violy.. i can't seem to locate her hehehe.. at least Ma'am M knows that i'm already finished.. that am not doing anything hahayy.. sucks..

aaayy.. just spotted Ma'am V.. eka brb

System Time: 12:02 PM
...nyek lunch nuh uh.. anywayz.. have already coordinated with other programmers so that they could use my code in their modules.. (read: la parin ako ginagawa huhuhu) .. waah olats ko.. have been adding people in my address book for my e-mail.. it's my college classmate's birthday yesterday.. so belated happy birthday Lala!!! ingats ka lagi and enjoy your day.. oiiii..lunch na talaga.. tama na pagpapanggap.. hehe ..later..

System Time: 12:51 PM
..brrrrr it's so cold here in the office.. forgot to bring my sweater *wapaks sarili* haaayyyy...

System Time: 1:18 PM
..arggh.. just remembered.. couldn't print my letter for momi last night.. freaking printer was having problems again.. think i wasted about an inch think of bond paper.. dunno what's wrong with it.. thought of using the printer here.. but.. what if something wrong happens.. like a paper jam or something (manol puh naman ako magtroubleshoot ng hardware).. i would be sure to ask someone else for help, then they would see what i was printing.. nyeks.. yoko nga.. 1. bawal, 2. asar talo na naman ako nun. hehe.. haayy badtrip..

gaaah tagal ng 6.

System Time: 2:41 PM
..yahooo! was given something new to do.. about converting constants to specified language format.. anywayz.. congrats to me, am now being fully used by the company.. hehe.. later..

System Time: 5:53 PM
..gwabe.. weird talaga ng oras.. when you want it to slow down, it speeds up! gaah.. at least i accomplished something.. already created a ttx file for the combo boxes..( in between e-mailing harbie and ria hehe)

will post this blog now.. cyah all!

ilabyumomi!

System Time: 9:04 AM

/me strets strets

aaahhh.. monday.. need i explain further? haahaay.
..was so hard to haul myself up and go to work..just thinking of my pillow makes me want to log out, say "fuck this job" and go back to bed..

System Time: 9:32 AM
...let the joyyyy riseeeeeeeeeeeeee..
had to put my "dance list" in winamp just so i would get in the mood.. am not sure if it's working.. i still want my pillow (-_-)

System Time: 9:46 AM
...ei, my dad and I went to Quiapo yesterday.. (yeah, piracy rulez lol!) .. bought some audio cds.. full albums of norah jones, stephen speaks, the calling, system of a down.. hmm.. oh yeah.. and vertical horizon.. my dad also bought pirated DVDs.. have i told you that we already have a new cabinet for our DVd collection? think it's like 7 layers.. 6 of which are already full.. hehe.. anywayz.. we now have Swimfan, Much Ado about Nothing, White Oleander, StarGate, err.. forgot the others..we wanted to exchange Four Feathers for another DvD 'cause it won't load on our player but the old prick wouldn't let us.. he told us a lot of shit like.. the paper is his but the cd isn't,..blah blah.. (as ifffffff, ano logic ng pagtatatak dun sa papel kung yung Cd pala e hindi daw sa kanya.. duuh.. edi yung Cd ang tatakan nya! ).. ok maybe i'm not making any sense.. well, to make a long story short.. just told my dad not to argue with him.. arguing over 65 bucks isn't worth it.. (a**hole talaga yun!) told my dad not to buy from that particular vendor anymore.. gaaah.. kainish talaga.. yung iba dun.. no questions asked, basta sabi namen, ayaw e.. edi yun palit.. kabuwsit yun.. it's such a hassle to go to Quiapo in the first place.. especially just to return some defective DVD.. tas ganon puh.. gaaah.. olats ..|..

System Time: 10:30 AM
..isn't it weird that when you go to work.. you wait for break times? like when it's 8 am.. you wait 'till it's 10 am.. then when it's after 10.. you wait for 12.. then i wait for 4 pm.. then i wait for 6.. lolz.. that's what i basically do all day.. (in between work.. hehe)..
..i wait..

System Time: 10:46 AM
..think i'm finished with what i'm supposed to do.. actually, didn't really do anything..'cause it was already coded by Froi and Chipper.. just had to standardize it..

System Time: 10:59 AM
*stifles a yawn*
gaah. katamad.

System Time: 11:16 AM
..mah gas.. i'm freakin sleeping, lolz.

System Time: 2:54 PM
..guess what i'm doing? yep.. i'm waiting for break time.. hehe.. actually.. have also been writing to momi.. nobela na nga ata e.. there's so much to say kasi.. haaay.. miss ko na siya -_-

System Time: 3:19 PM
..finished writing my letter.. haay.. bebehave na talaga ako para sa kanya.. kasi aminado naman ako.. paminsan kung kumilos ako eh feeling single.. pero yung iba ko namang friends (and a few officemates) alam na meh bf akong asa cebu.. eh ang dalang kasing magparamdam, khet ako tuloy nakakalimutan ko paminsan.. *wapaks momi*
basta.. ayan.. i'm saying here sa aking journal for all the world to see.. (err..este read).. i love my momi! :þ

System Time: 4:47 PM
.. now waiting for 6.. haaay.. tagal..

System Time: 5:55 PM
...nyek..dito si Ma'am Malou sa tabi namen kanina.. gwabe.. mega panggap uh.. anywayz.. she just asked when i'll finish.. actually, tapos na e.. pero told her bukas.. she seemed satisfied with my answer so pwede na yun..
ayun.. sige.. paalam na! hintay na lng ako 6.. babuu!

labyumomi!

System Time: 9:47 AM
...gud mawnin! ^_^ .. am in a good mood today because of the ff. reasons:
1. had a good night's sleep
2. it's Friday today! woohoo
3. was able to bring my eyeglasses (to lessen my "afternoon" headache)
4. have new workload (no more pagpapanggap)
5. did i mention that it's a Friday today? hehe

System Time: 10:44 AM
..ok, ok.. so tinatamad ako ngayun.. hehe! don't know what's wrong with me.. at first i was complaining that i had nothing to do.. now that i AM assigned to do something.. tinatamad naman ako! hmm.. friday kasi e! (eh? lolz.)

System Time: 3:42 PM
...ei.. there's so muuuch food in the pantry.. it's Sir Lainez' (the big boss) Birthday.. sabi nila dami daw beer din.. pero ala puh ko nakikita e! lolz. yoko na, uwi na lng ako kung wala hehe..

System Time: 4:00 PM
..hayy. still an hour to go..

System Time: 4:57 PM
..bwehehe.. bumilis yung oras!? hmm.. toma taym! babayyyy!

System Time: 8:48 AM
..mawnin.. had a very restless night.. i had a series of dreams.. some of which, i have completely forgotten.. some i could remember.. but only bits and pieces.. haay..

..can't help but feel bad.. i know i shouldn't be sorry but i am.. haaay momi.. para ka kasing kabute.. pasulpot sulpot na lang pag gusto mo.. basta remember this.. i do keep my promises.. and everything i've told you is true.. i am waiting for you.. hope you know and appreciate how much effort i've done just so our relationship would work.. i think it's time for YOu to do the same.. mababaw naman ako e.. just try to keep in touch.. be consistent.. 'di yung bigla kang maglalaho na parang bula.. kung once in 3 months.. edi ganon nga sana.. yung tipong meh maeexpect ako sayo in that span of time.. dali-dali kong icontact..snail mail, email, gb..di tulad ikaw.. di ko alam kung san kita hahagilapin.. don't say that i've won.. are we competing? naglalaro buh tayo? i would never intentionally hurt you.. think you should know that by now..
..haaaaaaaaaaay buhay.

System Time: 1:12 PM
..just when i thought i couldn't feel any worse.. fuck this life..
..well that was quick.. was over before it even really started..

I'M SO FUCKING GULLIBLE!

System Time: 1:29 PM
.. i need a hug. -_-

System Time: 1:47 PM
..currently listening to Smoke by Natalie I.

.. my mouth is dry.. forgot how to cry.. what's up with that.. your hurting me...
i'm running fast.. can't hide the past.. what's up with that.. your pushing me...

System Time: 5:14 PM
.. had one of those meetings again.. lasted for more than 2 hours.. at least got my mind focused on other things.. going to watch Nemesis later with my sister..i'm not a Star Trek fan, but she is.. la atang mahanap na makakasama kaya ako pinilit.. told her dapat libre para samahan ko sya.. hehe.. libre nga!

System Time: 5:45 PM
..just waiting again for 6 pm.. movie time's on 6:30 pm.. but we're going to watch in Greenbelt3 so i hafto leave exactly on 6 pm for me not to be late..

..will post this blog now.. bye all

OMG!!! MOMI? MOMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII WAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
ikaw ngaaaa..

momi... read mo message ko sa kabilang site..

System Time: 8:15 AM
..gud mawnin.. am still so sleypi. -_- my body feels as if it's not connected with my brain.. just typing this entails a LOT of effort from me..
..hay.. hope we'll have one of those meetings again so that they'll give us some new workload.. i didn't do ANYTHING yesterday.. imagine.. doing nothing for 8 fucking hours.. at least i still had a PC in front of me.. *remembers Ate cha's story, lol*

*sighs*

...guess my journal isn't really a journal.. i don't tell everything that's happening in my life here.. primarily because it's uploaded in my site for everyone to see..especially now..all i can say is that i'm happy and that's enough..what i'm doing is probably wrong in other people's point of view.. all i can say is.. fuck off! haha. juk onleh...actually, there's only one person who knows the whole story and i greatly appreciate her patience and pagkukunsinti hehe..seriously, i know what i'm doing and i know that i'm responsible for whatever consequences my actions might bring about..i'm actually preparing for it.. 'cause i know that every good thing must come to an end.. i just hope and pray that i'll be ready when that time comes..

..i wanna reach out and feel you beside me..
take you in my arms right now..
scream "i love you" right out loud..
someday i'll pray, that i find the strength..
to turn to you and say.....

... If i was the one who was loving you,
the only tears you'll cry will be tears of joy..
and if i was by your side..
you'll never know one lonely night..
and if it was my arms you were running to..
i'd give you loving in these arms of mine..
if i was the one.. in your life..

System Time: 9:45 AM
..still not doing anything.. this is gonna be one loooooooong day..

..ei, a thought just occured to me.. i'll be able to continue doing my book! remember my chat-inspired-logs book? hehe..think i momentarily forgotten about it (so what else is new? lolz).. well.. there was my tito's interment.. my ps2.. my errr *sekwet*.. hafto remember to bring my initial chapters tomorrow so i could resume my secret ambition of becoming a writer.. lol! woo-hoo!

System Time: 2:31 PM
..success! hehe. nope.. ndi ako nagjebs.. lolz.. can now successfully convert UTC to Local Date and vice versa.. finally understood that fucking SystemTimeToTzSpecificLocalTime.. anywayz.. still have one more module to make..
later..

System Time: 5:24 PM
..finished my self-assigned work load.. though am not sure if some of my codes will pass the "programming standards for VB"..

If eFormat = DTwithTime Then
sDTtemp = UTCToLT
sDTtemp = Left(sDTtemp, Len(sDTtemp) - 6) + " " + Right(sDTtemp, 2)
UTCToLT = sDTtemp
End If

..that code in particular..dunno if i should have used the SplitEx function.. hmmm..

..anywayz.. just waiting for log out time.. bye all!

My blog yesterday, March 10, 2003

System Time: 9:59 AM
.. actually, my system time's kinda advanced.. still have about 6 mins or more 'til break time..
..i wished for a busy week...isn't granted yet.. haay.. just hate when they don't give us anything to do.. it's soooo hard to pretend that you're doing something work related.. plus,.. what would i put on my project time sheet? i could see it already...

8:00 - 8:30 AM
listened to mp3
stared at my monitor
8:30 - 9:00 AM
listened to Rex Navarete
9:00 - 9:30 AM
opened my VB program
copied some public modules
listened to mp3
9:30 - 10:00 AM
stared at my monitor
listened to mp3

wow.. busy, eh?

..yes..yosi break..

System Time: 10:48 AM
... currently listening to Daft Punk.. One more time..

..one more timeeeeeee.. (sway sway sa utak lolz)

System Time: 11:36 AM
..okey.. my eyess are geyting heyvy.. i'm geyting sleypiiii.. lolz.. fucking PC monitor must have a curse.. a whoever-looks-at-the-monitor-falls-in-deep-stupor curse..

System Time: 1:28 PM
..ei office people are freaking out.. think some terminals lost their power supply.. sayang.. sana kami rin HEHE..

..ayy..la rin palang server..yeish! ayy.. awww pala.. *tries hard to make a sad face*

..ayyy.. *is truly bummed* ..forgot that i connect to the server for my MSDN.. can't get the tzSpecificLocalTimeToSystemTime structure without it.. (ano daw!? lolz)

..hmm.. think i'm getting dizzy.. though i don't know exactly why... >_<

System Time: 2:46 PM
...still NOT doing anything.. waaah.. anywayz.. they said that we're gonna be moved to a different workstation.. presently, our workstations are in the middle of the office (well, sort of..) so it's doubly hard to pretend that i'm actually doing something 'cause anyone who passes by sees what's on my monitor.. the new workstations are more discreetly positioned..

System Time: 3:19 PM
.. dunno if it's good news or bad news.. but the server's up and running again.. no more excuse in doing my module

System Time: 5:01 PM
..gaah.. Local time, System Time, UTC.. waaah.. currently studying their differences.. think the more i read about them.. the more confused i get...i'm assigned to the different Date/Time functions.. conversion to UTC time..etc..etc.. anything that has a DATE on it..

System Time: 6:10 PM
..gtg.. bye all!

...whewww.. i FINALLY found a PS2 game that could be played with a dance pad.. bought a dance pad last friday (after watching the movie with Eboy.. which was soooooo scary BTW.. scarier than Ring 1).. was excited to try it at home but unfortunately.. the ps1 game wouldn't load on my ps2 console.. demmit...the next day, went to the nearest mall (sta. lu) and looked for DDR dvd.. but they only had the ps1 version.. anywayz.. to make a long story short, my console wouldn't DETECT any ps1 game so i had to find a DDR for ps2.. but i couldn't find one ANYwhere.. but i did find a Britney Spears' Dance Beat Game... HAHAHAHAHA.. was better than nothing.. actually.. it was fun though i suckkkked at it.. they say practice makes perfect.. but in my case, i think the more i practice.. the lousier i get.. i swear.. must be the fatigue factor (HEHE)...

..i had a good weekend... aside from my DDR-trying-hard-moves.. i also got to practice my driving skills.. my dad allowed me to drive the pathfinder yesterday... think i'm even improving.. HEHE.. i only got yelled at a couple of times.. (my all time high was 7.. i counted, really) ... gusto kongggg matutongggg magdriveeeeeeeee.. hay.. actually.. di ko mashado gusto.. kasi gagawin lang akong family driver hehe.. my sister's still in indonesia.. (ate ging).. think she's gonna stay there for almost a year.. so that leaves my dad as the ONE and ONLY designated driver.. so i really need to learn in case my dad's not available or something..

..was at the Philippine Heart Center just this afternoon... my classmate Jane has a hole in her heart and is scheduled to be operated tomorrow.. my prayers for her and best of luck..

..hay.. work day tomorrow.. wishing for a busy week with lots of work load... (be careful what you wish for.... hehehe)

bye all! *mwah*

PS: my mom's getting addicted to Gran Turismo.. HEHE.. pat-ay.. meh kaagaw nuh ako sa PS2 haha
...
..

System Time: 1:35 PM
.. currently listening to Rex Navarete.. its sooo hard to keep myself from laughing out loud.. my shoulders keep on shaking.. don't want to be caught..

System Time: 2:10 PM
.. waah just heard the news.. ipagbabawal na daw mp3.. waaaaaah.. yaw daw ni Ma'am Q (supervisor) nakikinig sa mp3 while working.. nyeeeeekkss.. suckssss... :( kainish naman
.. waaaahhh.. NO MUSIC? sucksssssss.. kainish talaga!! eh pagkasabi.. ayaw daw nakikinig pagnagwowork.. ibig sabihin khet ndi mp3 bawal na.. khet transistor radyo puh.. kainishhhhhhhhh waaaaaahhh!
totally sucks! waah.. naiinish tlga ako.. hahaayy..

System Time: 4:53 PM
.. just a few minutes before logout.. gonna watch Ring 2 with Eboy.. anytime i have to watch a scary movie.. Eboy MUST be the one i'm going with.. we're scary-movie buddies.. hehe ..anywayz.. hope i'll still be able to sleep later.. hehe..

will post this blog now..
bye!

wow. nakakapost ako sa blog ko, real time! hehe
..later muna.. bago mahuli..

System Time: 8:43 AM
.. gud mawwwwninn! TGIF!!! i just love fridays because i get to wear jeans and a baby tee.. much more comfortable than my usual slacks and office attire... we're scheduled for another meeting later this afternoon..dunno what i'm going to do till then..
System Time: 9:11 AM
.. listening to John Mayer songs.. never get tired of his songs.. even after his songs are played on pop stations.. it doesn't bother me.. 'cause he deserves to be on the mainstream and be known as a super talented musician.. i want to buy his cd (any given thursday).. problem is, i don't have the money hahahA.. i'm planning on buying a PS2 gun so i'm saving up for that.. (anoo, laro na naman?) plus.. i'm still paying my dad for my PS2 and cable (monthly).. kaya dapat tipid.. (yeah right).. have been briefly reading ate charol's blog.. copied it to a notepad so that i'll be able to read it more freely without the fear of being caught surfing the net.. hehe.. waaaah ate chaa.. aymisyu..
.. it's kinda weird to think that one of my closest friends is someone that i have never even met.. but ate charol has been my kwento buddy.. she knows everything that's
happening in my life.. (even my deepest.. darkest.. over-sa-katangahan secrets..LoL!) .. not even my kabarkada here in the Philippines know some stories that i've been telling her.. maybe it's because.. as she says.. "let's rock the boat"!! lolz.. we seem to experience the same fucking cycle in this so-called madir fucking lablayp.. (oha bitter na ata ako haha)..

anywayz.. i don't know if she knows how much i appreciate all the times that she've listened (eh-em.. read) to my escapades, my troubles.. or just simple small
talk that doesn't seem "small" when she's the one listening to them.. kaya.. kung nagbabasa ka puh ng blog ko ate cha.. ilabyu 4ever and aymisyu and THANKYOUUUUUU!

>:D< (hahaha alam mo na kung ano yan!)

(gagawin ko yung kiss kaya lng di ko alam kung pano! kiniclick ko lng yun e haha)

*mwaaaah* ayan na lng!

My blog yesterday, March 6, 2003:

System Time: 11:43 AM
..had a meeting with Ma'am Malou and Ma'am Violy again.. still about the class modules given to us..it lasted for more than 2 hours.. (no 10 am break huhu)

System Time: 5:02 PM
...spent most of the day creating a list for date functions we need in the project.. actually, my next week's activities will be based on this list so i'm sort of cheating and making it short.. hehe..

System Time: 5:41 PM
.. not doing anything (again).. just waiting for 6 pm..

babaaaaaaaayy!

My blog yesterday, March 5, 2003:

System Time: 8:56 AM
..i'm baaaaaaaaaaack. back to the windows environment.. hello notepad, hello VB and most importantly.. helloooooww mp3s!!! lolz.

..VB project has started officially.. and am now receiving additional incentive for project involvement.. woo-hoo!

..Ma'am Marlyn just said that there's going to be a mass later at 12 pm..it's Ash Wednesday today and i almost got late because my mom cooked longanisa for my baon.. hehe.. was a good thing that my dad reminded her, she cooked some shrimps for me and i had to wait for another 15 minutes for that.. dad had to drive me to the office himself just to make sure that i'll be on time..

System Time: 11:00 AM
..ok.. i'm not doing ANYthing.. just hate it when they give us something to do with no deadline.. we all finished yesterday and we are in desperate need for something new to do..

System Time: 11:28 AM
.. staring at my monitor.. (again) .. think i'm starting to get hungry.. hafto change p3s.. still have my old set in this workstation.. chipper brought a cd mp3 but has not yet finished copying them to our PCs..

System Time: 4:52 PM
..was called in a meeting to explain the class modules that were assigned to us.. not yet close to finishing it..

System Time: 6:15 PM
.. OT na toh! haha.. gtg bye!

i feel like shit.

so what else is new in this madir-paking-layp.

i just want to be happy. is that too much to ask? why do i keep on making the wrong decisions? why do i always make myself miserable? why do i always get involved with the wrong persons? .. he's either too far from me..too young for me.. married for pity's sake.. too insecure.. too afraid.. or am i just so priking gullible.. how can i be so naive? i'm not a kid anymore.. but i feel so childish with all my rantings and emotional distress.. isn't it my turn to be happy? when will that happen..

i'm alright... it only hurts when i breathe

my tito ogie, my dad's brother, died last sunday night.. we got the news a little after i posted my blog..

hay.

since then, araw araw nuh kami sa burol.. ako, after office.. kasi di naman ako maka-absent dahil 'di naman "immediate family".. pero close parin,.. hay.. wawa mga pinsan ko.. mas matanda pa nga dadi ko keh tito.. yung family ni tito yung taga Isabela.. yung farm nya ang ginawan namin ng automated system sa thesis ko.. tas halos every year.. pumupunta kaming Isabela after christmas.. hay.. last week nga lang eh kausap ni dadi si tito sa phone.. ipinagmamalaki yung mga itik na bagong bili nya hehe.. kaya magkasundo yung 2.. kasi si dadi, nag fafarm-liit na rin .. tas si tito ogie taga bigay ng advice.. pero nung tungkol sa itik baliktad naman,.. si dadi ang nagbibigay ng advice kasi sya naunang itry yun.. puro tilapia kasi tsaka manggahan meron si tito.. ayun...

grabe antok na ako.

sa sabado na libing.. hay.. yoko ng umiyak.. marami pang wento e.. as in.. meron tungkol keh tito.. merong tungkol saken...

yung tungkol saken.. errr.. pag kinuwento ko... baka patayin ako ng mga kaibigan ko.. lolz.. so akin na lng yun.. -_-

waah la wenta blog ko.. at least nagparamdam ako hehe..

ingats senyu..

i know, i know,... i haven't been blogging.. it's just that i've been busy (eh-em) with work (eh-em) and household chores.. hehehe

but i do have something new to write.. two BIG news.. one is big in the money.. the other is.. errr.. i don't even know how to start that one..

first.. meh PS2 nuhhhhh kooooooooooooo wooooohoooooooo *jumps up and down* .. can't believe my dad lent me money.. i'll be paying him back monthly.. which is sooooo cool 'cause at first, i was planning on using ate chary's cc but then the INTEREST alone would cost me 3 thou + bucks.. didn't even ask my father to pay cash.. he volunteered.. sooo happy.. was playing Minority Report yesterday till i was dizzy and my sister told me to shut the thing down.. hafto remember to bring the 3 (grr) PS2 games back 'cause they're not loading properly..

now for the other news.. hmm.. think i told this bit of news to 2 persons.. (only) .. haven't told anyone PERSONALLY cause i know i'll be PHYSICALLY assaulted (read: battered and bruised hehe).. i could hear it already.. "wahaha TANGA moooooo *wapaks ako* papaha-rass ka dunnn" LOL! okey.. so i'm not making sense.. i don't know WHERE and HOW to begin my story.. so i guess i'll just say what has been most bothering me..

our lips touched

NYEH yun lang.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. yun ngaaaaaa e. sa akin.. ala yun.. eh pag kinuwento ko.. wahahaha.. yari ako.

..think i'm having a smeagol/gollum moment here.. i'm actually contradicting myself.. tsk tsk tsk.. bad sign

hmmm.. but my friends do have a point.. SUMOBRA ata ang pag enjoy ko.. hehe.. i actually got pretty good advices from the 2 people whom i told this episode (a.k.a kalandian ko)

thoughts to ponder:
1. alam mo na ginagawa mo, geri
2. lahat ng sobra, masama.. (read: sobrang harutan bawal!)
3. everything in moderation, geri
4. di mo tuloy alam kung kikiligin ka or ma guilty ka
5. boundaries, boundaries, boundaries

hehe. and my point/s:
1. i'm not expecting anything from him
2. am just having fun :)
3. masaya, eh LOL

haha la wenta yung akin.

sige. ayan nagblog ako.

babayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy *mwah sa CHEEKs* sa inyong lahat LOL!

*still sleypi*

went to kuyuh allan's birthday celeb last night.. got home at past 2 am.. my mom waited up for me.. so i'm still feeling guilty 'bout that.. but still, no regrets.. 'cause i had fun and got to drink mah fave SMB.. hehehe..

before that, my officemates and i had to go to the world trade center to watch our company's product presentation.. aliwww.. parang field trip.. katuwa.. hahayy.. pero yoko na atang tumabi keh "ano".. kasi inaasar na ako at sows.. yoko matsismis sa meh asawa na.. mah gas LOL

AAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

just remembered the trilogy Eboy and i are reading.. madir pakir of a book.. kala ko naman liligaya ako dun eh lalo akong nadepress.. langhiya! tama bang mamatay yung lalake in the end.. buwsit. itago nyo sa bato.. yung gagawin kong libro HAPPY ENDING. lolz

did i mentioned that before? i'm writing a book.. similar to the one we're reading.. hope i actually finish THIS. i'm just soooooo good at starting things but never actually finishing them..

HAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYY!

just disconnected at IRC. some days are okay.. but some days.. fuck. SANA talaga hindi ko na sya nakilala. AS IN! di ko siya maintindihan. bakit buh meh mga ganong tao? alang wenta.

nood na lng ako pirated dvd. hehe. babayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

p.s.
tribute to my IRC friends. ate charol i labyu, nardo ever generous, james, dex, mon, kyla, k8tee, mark... kayo mga rason bat bumabalik parin ako sa IRC.. mga buwsit kayo hahahaha.. juk lng.. sana lahat ng tao sa IRC tulad nyo. *tago lahat kayo sa aking bulsa* hehe.. labyu all!

haaay. TG this day is over.

thought it was going to be just another boring day... you could say that it was my fault.. me and my being lazy.. just decided that i wanted to skip work again..

woke up at the sound of my mother's voice... don't know who she's talking to.. but i think she was talking to someone on the phone..

dragged myself out of bed and went down to see her watching TV.. she didn't look like she was watching actually.. just staring to space..

hay...

she's hurt that my father didn't ask her to come with him to his errand... when she woke up my father already left..

my father kept on making ME the reason.. that I would be left all by myself.. blah blah.. hay.

spent the WHOLE day convincing my mom not to leave us. my eyes still hurt 'cause i've been crying all day.. my mom looks worse.. she hasn't even eaten.. i've tried giving her dinner.. she wouldn't open the door.. i texted her... told her to get her food.. she said she wasn't hungry.. TG for modern communication devices..

dad's already home.. told him he shouldn't talk to mom yet.. mom's too angry..

she told me how he kept on making her feel insignificant.. the my father doesn't treat her as his partner.. that he has no respect for her.. i tried to defend my father.. i tried so hard... she told me how my father was never a gentleman to her.. it hurts so much to hear her say that.. 'cause i love my father.. and i think he's the best.. he's never been unkind to me and my sisters.. he doesn't have vices like other fathers do.. she just told me some more stuff that i didn't want to hear.. i love my mother also.. unconditionally.. but i don't know what to tell my father.. HE's just like that.. its hard to change him now.. my mother said we bring the worst in her..

hay.

my blog doesn't make any sense right now.. i'm just confused.. and tired.

i'm texting my mother right now.. to think she's just in the other room..

my mom's tired also. she told me how it was hard to be alone for more than 25 years.. she didn't work so that she could take care of us.. she said that she would sometimes go on a whole week without uttering a word.. 'cause my father will be out before she wakes up.. and when dad comes home it'll be just to eat and sleep.. she has so many regrets in her life.. she told me some of them today..

i'm not a good daughter you see.. i'm not showy.. my sisters are worse.. she just wants to feel our love.. and our appreciation..

i just want to turn back the time.. i want to change.. to take back EVERY disrespectful thing i've said to her.. done to her..

but i can't do that... but i do have tomorrow.. and many other chances..

hey all! i'm back.

am gonna start looking for free online photo album stuff.. gaaaah.. getting more and more pictures but i simply don't have enough time to create a flash movie for them.. hafto uploadddd them in my site but i'm so priking lazy.. so the best alternative is have somebody else do it for me.. hehe..

hmm.. have a RPG test tomorrow.. actually.. we weren't supposed to be included in that test (cause duuuh.. we might not even use RPG in radix 'cause we're reserved for the VB projects) but since the following events, Ma'am Bel wants us to make our office time more productive..

1. got caught playing LOTR TCG
2. got caught playing 3-D montage pictures
3. got caught sleeping

hehehe. it has been ONE LONNNNNG week. TGIF tomorrow..

wish i could watch Stephen speaks' concert on Feb 8.. still hafto find someone to go with.. haaaaaaaaay..

gtg.

bye!

hi all!

had a blast at caleruega.. got loads of pictures.. will hopefully add to my soon to be uploaded site gallery..

not in the mood right now to make wento.. but all i can say is, i needed that break.. and it was soo good for me.. to see my classmates again and enjoy their company..

well.. bye now.. *mwah*

read this in my e-mail. thanks eboy.

There are times in my life when I don't see the truth
and listening to your sweet words just takes me away from the world...
I needed love, I needed what I always have
and I thought you could give me that...
I know now that you never could...
If I could turn back time is an appropriate phrase to use for us,
although if I had the chance, I wouldn't change it all...
Just the part where I didn't let you go when I knew it was best for me...
I thought I would be with you until I lay to rest forever
Caught up in a dream - or so it seemed...
I thought you loved me the way I did you.
All the times you looked into my eyes, not even inches from my face.
The heat of your body made me feel comforted,
and I had imagined many more days like this.
It was all a dream...a dream that made me realise
there is more to the world than you.
There are people out there
that will return the love I felt for you...
not take it, steal it, and leave me cold and afraid.
Without you, I never thought I would be...
Yes, a few times I did, but I thought I'd be the one to make the move.
Not be here crying as if you are the most important factor in my life.
You aren't. You never were.
My mind was made up, and now my heart has changed.
Your cold eyes will never be twisted to make me feel safe again,
because all along you were the one to hurt me.
No more excuses, no second chances.
I'm leaving your memory now, because if I don't
I won't be able to move on, forget, and be happy.
I have too much at risk for that.
Too much for you to take, but I won't let you anymore.
You are alone...or maybe she'll accept you.
I'm not in your life.
No longer will I put my heart on the line with effort or try to tell you
how deeply I cared, because it is over forever.
Although I will remember you, remember the things that I have learned
and the good times I have experienced,
you will be the one remembered
as hurting me more than anyone has ever hurt me before...
I've made up my mind and decided what is best, AND I AM NOT COMING BACK!!!

alayb again.

good news... am now a regular employee.. aka junior programmer (from programmer trainee).. also got an increase which hopefully will sustain my addiction to LOTR TCG.. speaking of which.. bought another one at megamall today.. the all new Aragorn, Two Towers starter deck.. woohoo... well.. another 450 bucks lost..

am going to caleruega tomorrow.. at long last our retreat will finally pull through after 2 cancelations.. though am not that excited 'cause eboy and roni probably won't be there.. sucks.. thought our barkada would at least be complete.. anywayz.. have to sleep early 'cause i hafta be at UST around 7 am.. don't want to be left behind..

have been doing almost NOTHING this past week at the office.. just been playing LOTR with chipper and kuyuh roni.. though we sometimes take a break and work a little.. hehe (15 minute break LOL!)

hmm.. have not been thinking of pangs.. (yeah right) but really, can see my past blog here in this editing mode and i mentioned him there.. i think he won't call anymore 'cause HE's the one who's pissed at me.. as they say.. nothing lasts forever..

heard from the hip-hop guy yesterday.. was actually pretty happy to hear from him.. he's still my friend after all.. he's working at this factory for KFC and we chatted for a few minutes at the phone.. was basically just listening at his marinating escapades and KFC hotshots stories...hehe..

all in all i think it has been a pretty so-so week.. normal.. boring.. just the way i want it..

night all and God speed.

if i had trouble sleeping last time.. the problem's been totally reversed.. now, it seems as if all i do is sleep!.. like yesterday.. i was just thinking of having my siesta at around 4 pm.. but then i woke up at 7:30 am the next day.. wahahahaha..

know i haven't been blogging.. mainly because i don't have an isp account.. am currently (discreetly) using my sister's.. she's in the loo and i'm taking advantage of the fact hehe..

don't have anything new to talk about.. still am training for RPG at work.. still am going home late because of it..

had a chick-flick movie marathon yesterday.. watched the sweetest thing and bridget jones diary.. couldn't decide whether i felt light hearted or more depressed after watching it... i mean, the endings are the same.. they were happy because they got the guy.. hmm.. sucks.. we're so guy dependent.. suckkkkksss

anywayz.. speaking of guys.. pangs is just so.. GAAAH. kakadismaya.

sobra.

ang kapal ng mukha.

yun lang. /me bow.

can't believe someone like him exists. okay. so maybe i'm talking nonsense to you. but it doesn't matter. fuck. what matters is that you know that his an A**hole. langkwentaaaaaaaaaaaaa buwsit. and he had the nerve to give me the lamest excuse in the world.. ano kala nya saken.. tanga? putek. oo nga.. tanga ko.. ANG BAIT KO KASI. taena. ganito talaga mundo. pag mabait ka.. wala kang dapat asahan sa mga tao. kalimutan na. pakyo.

/me baba kilay na nung linggo puh nakataas.

/me tsk tsk tsk. still can't fucking believe it. now i know what kind of a person he is. WALANG WENTA.

why am i such a poor judge of character?????

why do i always get associated with these kind of people... gaaaah. KIDS.

ANYWAY.

ate cha! hahahahahaha. yun lang. lagot ka hahahaha. /me hugs ate cha sabay kiss sa neck. misyu bruha!

ayun babay na. paramdam lang sa blog ko.

/me flying kiss sa lahat except keh pangs na buwsit.

/me kanta.. it's been quite a while...

have been going home late for the past week.. so that i'll have no trouble sleeping because i'll be so freaking tired when i get home.. same stuff at work.. though we have a new project exercise.. it's been a good therapy for me.. though sometimes my mind feels separate from my body.. hafta concentrate extra hard to get the work done...

i do look forward to seeing my officemates.. 'cause they could always make me laugh.. ^_^

TGIF? i guess.. oh yeah... LOTR the two towers will be showing tomorrow.. my sisters and i will watch it of course.. twice even, 'cause ate chary bought us some tickets for sunday at greenbelt3.. i told them i wanted to watch it tomorrow and they said that we will.. PLUS on sunday also.. (weird namen noh?) fanatics rule. lol.

have no account.. am illegally using my sister's.. just wanted to visit my blog...

nite all.

PS. saw his face again. tsk.

i feel so empty.

spent the whole day lying in bed.. have been reading again.. it helps me fall asleep.. -_-

ok.. so i chatted yesterday using webchat.. fuck. and what good did it bring? zilch. only made me more miserable than before.. i disconnected after only a couple of minutes.. and scolded myself .. priking masochist.. torturing myself by seeing him online...

i pray... for indifference..

nite all.

brain drain

was at the office for more than 13 hours today... was late 'cause i was trying to help some of my officemates with their exercises.. actually, i didn't want to go home yet, but i didn't want to go somewhere else after leaving the office so i just loitered there for a while..

hay.

ma'am belle said that ma'am violy, our project manager for the VB project (which was the original reason why i was hired at radix) will talk to us on monday.. she also said that the rest of our classmates (my new officemates) will work on the other room.. awwwww.. i'm going to miss them 'cause it's always such a riot when they start to goof around the training room.. we could be realllyyyy loud.. lol.. probably be starting with the VB project this year so it's babay AS400 for the 4 of us.. hay. iiwan na namin sila. how sad.

speaking of missing.... i'm missing this certain someone SO much that it causes this constant chest pain in every moment that i think of him..which is like 70% in a day..(remaining time is when i'm thinking of my program).. it's either him or work...sometimes it even interferes in my work that i couldn't concentrate... gaaaaaah.

*sighs*

and i miss you.. like the deserts miss the rain... -- Everything But The Girl

nite all.

my post yesterday, January 1, 2002.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

work day again tomorrow.. sucksss...
anywayz.. time to recap the year that was...

2002

JANUARY - was assigned to Bacolod, met Ate Cash there (for the first time).. went together to Cebu (on Ate Cash' birthday) to meet momi and Mel.. saw dolphins while on the barge woo-hoo! (tama bang mas natuwa sa dolphin)

FEBRUARY - left Bacolod,.. started thinking of resigning from work.. (was at Infostructure then).. mainly because I was so down.. I kept thinking of my momi and how we just parted ways with no definite plans or promises..

MARCH - continued working.. went back to Manila clients.. MIRIAM, Business Sense, etc.

APRIL - handed my resignation letter.. though i still had one more month before it took effect.. met pangs in IRC (tsk)

MAY - 22nd was my last day of work for Infostructure.. started having my online journal... was also the month when i was called intangible by peter.. (:p) hay. *shoos away lonely thoughts*.. still a bum..though i think i started looking for a new job..

JUNE - received snail mail from momi.. had my official break up with him.. went to different interviews, tests, etc. at computer companies..

JULY - new job at Radix Systems.. started my VB training.. new officemates.. tried to put my life back on track... also the month when i uploaded my new site.. the home of this blog..

AUGUST - still training for VB.. though after the training,..started to get bored at work.. so i started blogging in a notepad at the office..

SEPTEMBER - harbie's new of engagement.. (IKAKASAL KA NAAAAAA hehe) started making the fan site.. momi also surprisingly left a message in my old guestbook.. saying that he was here in MANILA! (@_@)

OCTOBER - momi and i met again.. was momentarily happy.. but of course, all good things must come to an end.. he went back to Cebu after he took the board exam.. was soooo down... then found out that pangs has a gf. which was like.. nYeH. started avoiding him.. reasons for which were pretty obvious.. i had feelings (eh-hem) for him..which i would gladly remove in my system if i could. -_-

NOVEMBER - birthday month! had a birthday bash in my house.. was a success inspite of the brownout.. (boo).. also started AS400 training at work.. was a good thing because i was really getting to dislike work.. met new officemates.. kuyuh allan, kuyuh alain (kamukha ni benjie paras LOL), ate melody, kuyuh rony (ka-magic ko), ate gay (HP fan!), ate joy(seatmate ko na sa training room), ate jenny (ang tangkad!) and ate lyn.. errp.. almost forgot.. the month i made a bloody mess at Boni overpass.. which left me literally, scarred for life.. hehe

DECEMBER - christmas party at office.. was soooo fun.. was an expensive christmas season.. ANG PASKO AY PARA SA BATA hehe.. decided to stop chatting.. still don't know the outcome of that resolution..then of course.. facing singleton life (again! *sighs*)

whew. for details, read my blogs! lol.

hope to see you guys around.. sign nyo guestbuk ko.. or sa forum (kung buhay puh yun lolz).. tsismisan nyo naman ako hehe..
ingats!

hay. kakasenti. hehe. (sabay tawa)

seriously.. i miss HS life.. problems back then were petty and easily solved.. EMOTIONal problem? ano yun dibuh? now i know the meaning of the words.. wholly and embedded in my soul..

here's to my Kulasa friends! *hugs* *mwah* missyou!

LOL!

why d laugh? been reading some HS palanca letters.. throwing out some (ansama!) think keeping some of them for more than 5 years is enough.. was i THAT bad when i was in highschool? got a lot of stuff like... "kaka pikon ka talaga dati" or.. "paminsan isipin mo naman na nakakasakit ka na ng tao" HEHE. actually.. now that i try to remember.. i was really kinda (?) mean.. especially when i was in 3rd year HS.. really treated the "other" kids err.. basta ndi ako mabait.. i was only good with MY friends.. but i think i changed during my senior year.. tried to be friends with everyone.. and i got some positive reactions from that in my letters also.. that i was friendlier and i tried to widen my circle of friends.. hehe..

will go back to reading.. gaaah.. wasn't i supposed to be cleaning?

presently cleaning my room... my hands are so filthy that i think i'm leaving fingerprints in my keyboard.. hehe.. think i'm already half way through.. been mostly throwing out stuff.. unlike most people.. i'm not really the sentimental type.. like the ones who have a hard time throwing stuff 'cause they always recall some sort of cherished memory from things.. i remember them, mind you.. but i think they'll just gather dust anyways so it's better to get rid of them.. i've always believed that memories are instilled in the mind.. not in material things.. that's just my opinion, of course...

there are a few stuff that i can't throw away, though.. mostly letters from different people.. like palanca letters i received when i was in highschool and college .. (the kind they give you when you're in a retreat).. birthday greetings.. letters from ex's... yep they're still there.. don't have the heart to throw them.. can't even delete my IRC logs... placed all of them in a separate folder.. it sometimes makes me happy to read them... i try not to ponder on what happened to THESE people.. but to concentrate on HAPPY moments.. happy thoughts.. :)

also destroyed (hehe) my harry potter shrine.. now, it consists of my TCG collection.. bought a new one yesterday.. a Legolas starter deck for my LOTR TCG.. quite happy with it.. think i stared at Legolas' face for a full minute before opening the box.. lol..

/me looks at bedside table..

gaah.. there are SO much junk stuffed inside that i have this urge to just throw EVERYTHING out.. better start.. it's already 12:30 pm and i wanna finish before i eat my lunch..

blog u later.

PS. TG i deleted my IRC. right after i connected i clicked my IRC shortcut located in my taskbar..got confused for a minute 'cause the dialog "finding program achuchu" sprung up.. sorry.. bad habit -_-.

just a few days to go before the start of a new year... time for resolutions.. not that i actually do them.. it's just fun for a while when you remember them and attempt to stick to them.. even for just a few days... i remember telling myself last year to stop swearing... was pretty funny cause i'll be saying..."tae" instead of tangina.. hmm.. though i think this year has become my "swear smorgasbord all time high year" hehe..

... has been an OK year.. considering...
1. resigned from first job.. reasons for which were pretty stupid.. just got to the point that i can find no satisfaction in my life..
2. got a new job.. office sux...
3. lost a really really BIG material thing (gaah.. naalala ko na naman -_-)
4. still no improvement re: relationship with dex

i was considering going to Cebu next year.. in time for sinulog.. and to meet him again.. but i decided (just now) to follow my friend's advice...i quote mel: "ang dami mo nang nagastos para sa kanya. marami pang iba dyan sa tabi tabi".. tama! hehe... he didn't even greet me this christmas.. :( it's so sad.. but i'm beyond tears already.. i just feel like i'm a big empty box.. -_-

i decided to do something drastic this year.. really drastic for me 'cause it has been my lifestyle for the past couple of years.. i'm going to attempt to stop chatting.. (take note of the "attempt" word).. IRC has brought a lot of pain in my life this year.. although it had its moments.. not to forget my wonderful IRC friends... (*hugs ate charol) but i think.. new year calls for a new start..
... i'm still going to blog.. and finish everything that i've started.. (like my HP and the fan site).. i'm going to delete my 2 IRC programs in my hard disk tonight.. that's why i'm considering this night as my last night to go online and properly say farewell to my #ust friends.. (LOL DRAMA!) .. think this is going to be the best decision that i'll make this year.. to stop chatting.. my family will be grateful of course... especially my sisters.. who have been my constant complainers.. hehe...

...i'll see you guys around.

happy new year :)

be good to yourself. hay ate cha.

SANA talaga magising na ako.

TAMA BANG GAMITIN ANG KANTA KO PARA SA IBANG TAO. DATS MAH MADIRPAKING SONG.

buwsit!

-_-

hay. pak. -_-

almost forgot...

tama bang lumampas ako kaninang umaga sa opisina.. taenang yan.. wala kasing katraffic-traffic! naiba yung oras ko ng pagtulog sa shuttle.. paggising ko.. putik asa guadalupe na ako eh dapat sa boni ako bumababa.. sayang tuloy 10 piso ko sa mrt.. buti na lang maaga pa... ndi parin ako nalate.. pero takte.. sayang pera ko! haha.. la lang..

gudnayt all!

been thinking on my way home re: my program. (watda!?).. i mean.. i kept debugging in my head my source code as to why it isn't functioning in the way i expected it to be.. lolz.. anywayz.. the exercise is actually finished.. but Ma'am Belle explained her style to us and i wanted to adapt it to my program.. but i can't fucking make it work.. hay.. already have a game plan for tomorrow.. sorry but i have to blurt them out here for me to remember them...
.. 1. create separate subroutine for review option (use mode=4)
2. check the freaking loop.. my 'val' variable, my dowhile statement
3. make sure i turned off indicators and cleared message description field after EXFMT

... hmmm... my officemates kept on telling me not to change my program (cause it's already finished) but i really really want to try and make Ma'am Belle's style work..

haaaaaay.

gaaaaaaaaah.

la lang! hehe. nakngputekgustokonangpumuntasacebu!

merry christmas. :)

haaaaaaaaay. /me sings.. everything falls apart..

can't even talk about it here in the blog.. makes me soooooooo sad.

can't seem to see the silver lining in this particular grey cloud..

:)

gotta sleep.

bye.

grabe. watachristmasparti! was really flooding with beer.. they said they bought a total of 18 cases.. i was already wasted around 2 am.. was a little bit disappointed with our presentation 'cause we could barely hear our vocalist.. tas feedback pa ng feedback yung lecheng mic.. hehe.. pero i think maraming nagulat na marunong akong magdrums.. kaya aliw...

kainish puh e.. nung mga 2 am na nga.. humiga lang ako dun sa pinagdikit dikit kong upuan.. thinking na sandali lng.. idlip lang.. naramdaman ko na lng na ginigising na ako at 4 am na at pauwi na daw sila.. lolz!.. olats ko kainish haha.. nakatulog talaga ako.. bilib nga daw sila saken dhel khet gaano sila kaingay tulog parin daw ako.. ayun.. ay .. nanalo ako ng rice cooker.. hahahaha.. kaya nagpasama muna ako keh koji pauwi kasi di ko alam kung pano ko bibitbitin yung rice cooker tsaka yung giveaway na ham and other achuchuchu stuff.. saya talaga! tas kulit ng presentations ng iba.. yung 2 grupo parehong nag dance number.. kakatawa sobra.. tas meh badtrip palang nangyari.. tangina nakabasag ako ng baso.. hiyang hiya ako nun chet.. talagang nagslip lang sa kamay ko.. waaaaah... kahiya.. obvious tuloy na lasheng na ako.. eh mababa lang alcohol tolerance ko e.. nung naka 6 na ako talagang meh tama na talga ako.. lolz.. bitin nga ako dun sa sayawan.. kasi ngaaaaaaa natulog ako bwiset hahaha.. nung ginising na nila ako.. pumunta muna kaming wendys nagpatanggal ng amats.. tas isa isa nameng hinintay na makasakay yung mga officemates ko... tas kami ni koji bumalik sa office.. stay kami dun hanggang mga quarter to 7 .. tas nakauwi ako mga 8 a.m... oha.. ang aga kong umuwi.. lol!

gusto ko pang magwento kaya lang medyo tinatamad na ako.. hehe.. ay meh isa pang good news.. meh nagiinquire (sa wakas) dun sa thinkpad ko.. magkikita kami supposedly bukas para tingnan nya yung unit.. sana kunin na.. para magkapera na ako...

ayun.. babay !

just drank one bottle of beer. a teaser for tomorrow's christmas party... kuyuh don² offered us some.. hehe.. now am really psyched up to bang away on the drums...

gaah.. papunta na daw sila dito.. ang tagal! lumaki kagad tsan ko sa isang beer hehe..

surp ulit.

wow. am actually posting at the office... just waiting for my officemates to arrive with the equipment.. gonna have our last practice for tonight.. already 8 pm and still no sign of chipper and koji...

am actually pretty excited for our presentation tomorrow.. but am also a bit nervous 'cause we haven't practiced that much.. total of just 2 practices in a band studio.. gaaah!? i mean, how good can one get in just 2 practices? that's why our last practice is very critical.. don't want to totally embarass ourselves infront of the whole company!

hayyy.. am again adjusting with the PC keyboard.. /me tapon backspace key tutal ndi ko naman ginagamit. chet.

hmm... ANG TAGAL nila.. asan na buh sila..

surp muna. hafto grab the chance of a DSL connected net.

bye all!

hi all!!!

nice to see my posting page for my blogger site.. been 4 days since my last blog.. nothing spectacular has happened, just us still practicing for the christmas party.. we attempted to practice again today but it turned out to be just one LONG road trip..

gaaah.. i have reached my quota storage limit for my yahoo account... paking forwarders.. LOL.. (juks onleh guys)

nyehhhhhhhh... just found out they lowered my access in #ust.. nawala lang ako ng ilang araw, ano buh yun!? ... hay feeling ko suspect na naman ako dun sa nagtatanggal ng axes ng mga tao.. as ip..di ako nagtatanggal noh.. tsk.. hay. sa bagay.. di ko nga napansin e,.. kung hindi lang tinanong saken ni johnell kung bakit bumaba access ko.. gaaah..

anywayz ayun.. hay.. eka nabwiset ako e, LOL!

hay magdedelete pa ako ng mail. practice na naman ulit bukas... mag te-twelve na.. dapat ng makatulog..

ay.. saw Ton² today.. cute nya parin. lalo na nung sinabi nyang.. "hi, che" HEHEHE. tas biglang hirit na "oh, parang bangag ka pa?"
kakagising ko lang kasi sa fx tas biglang stop ko na pala. lolz. anywayz ayun.. always a pleasure to see him. maybe i'll have sweet dreams later. :)

nayt all!

haven't been blogging... usually am very tired and sleepy when i get home from work.. anywayz.. still same work.. same officemates.. been training now for RPG, one of the programming languages you can use on an AS400 machine.. has been pretty interesting.. though my officemates are the main reasons why i'm enjoying the trainings.. they could be quite a riot.. lol!

..just got home actually..my batchmates and I have been practicing for our presentation for the office christmas party.. we'll be presenting first (boo-hoo) so the pressure's on us.. gaaah.. just hope we won't screw up.. we've been playing (or at least attempting to) sway.. don't stray.. don't ever go away.. ..i'm playing the drums.. hehe.. we still have another practice tomorrow here at our house.. we don't have any electric guitars or amps so we'll just have to use acoustic guitars.. at least we'll be able to practice the chords and the singing parts..

hmm.. christmas is fast approaching.. and i still haven't bought any gifts for my family.. already bought stuff for my inaanaks.. (i only have two).. hay. SMC na naman! lolz!.. i miss my momi ... if a genie popped up and gave me a wish, i'd wish for us to be together... it makes me so sad when i think of the possibility that we might not meet again.. 'cause i haven't heard a WORD from him ever since he left for Cebu.. hay momi. it's a fucking cycle. -_-

actually.. i don't what's wrong with me.. but there have been some very disturbing thoughts entering my head.. that maybe it's not Dex that i miss perce.. but you know..that i may be just plain missing someone whom i could love and be with.. hmm.. and my thoughts on pangs.. (uh-oh.. not again..).. i think i've figured out and labeled some emotions that i've been feeling these past few weeks.. and ever since knowing what these feelings are, have been doing my best to stop them.. and just block things out... when i find myself thinking about him... or when i'm missing him.. i just STOP and do other stuff.. it's extremely hard.. especially writing this in my blog.. cause the more i write about him.. the more that i know how helpless my situation is.. i'm in love again with someone who doesn't love me back... i'm nothing to him.. when all i want to be is everything for him... tsk tsk tsk.. maybe it's really easy for me to fall for someone.. 'cause i've only met him once for God's sake.. and here i am.. writing an almost entire blog about him.. if he just stopped calling you know,.. i just know that i'll be able to forget him.. time does heal wounds .. but not when the wound keeps on getting scratched and messed with.. if he would just ignore me, give me my one last cry.. then all of my whining and longing will be over... hay. this blog is making me lonely again.

gotta sleep. much to do on d morrow.

no melody can seem to soothe my mind

just got home... syempre pinagalitan na naman ako.. ewan ko buh sa kanila.. sinabi ko naman na ihahatid ako sa bahay... gaaahh..

san buh ko galing, aber..

una.. kumain kami sa shangri-la.. syempre japanese ulit.. sa kitaro.. tas konting arcade.. tas nung mga 9 pm na, pumunta na kami ni Koji kela Spraken.. ayun.. 2 beer.. tapos nung mga 10:30 pm.. pumunta na kami Big shots.. andun din iba naming officemates..

ayun.. umalis ako dun 1:30 am at nakarating ng bahay ng 2:30am.. hahaaaaaaay.. tas eto ako ngayon online parin LOL!..

hay tutulog na nga ako.

paalam!

just finished encoding my blog.. hehe.. so low-tech..

anywayz.. already 11:30 pm.. prepared my Harry potter cards.. ate gay and i might be able to play during lunch time.. Ma'am Bel said we'll be starting with RPG programming tomorrow.. excited for that, now that i'm actually getting the hang of CL programming..

nite all!

...presently writing in my Harry Potter notebook.. have finished all exercises ahead of time (woohoo!) and am just entertaining myself..
..read this free novel from cosmo on my way to the office..titled 'Getting Better' by Tara FT Sering.. got depressed after finishing it.. not that it wasn't well written.. it actually had funny moments but i didn't like the ending.. story was nothing original.. the girl found out that her fiance` cheated on her.. in the end she moved on with her life because she found her replacement man.. sucks.. thought cosmo's theme was all about fun, fearless females... gaaah.. so the question is, .. is another man the answer to one's heartache? of course,.. the answer is a resounding NO.. that's the main reason why i didn't like the novel.. the lead character was a pathetic, dependent woman.. i mean, why does it become a "happy ending" when a girl gets hooked up with a new guy.. haaaaay..
..life's unfair..(eh? basta yun na yun!)

..learned a new slang today.. keps.. LOL!!! had to ask Koji and Chipper its meaning.. was later ashamed to death that i haven't learned it sooner.. gaaah! .. at least the novel had its purpose.. contained a lot of slangs..(bastos slangs hehe)

..haven't scanned my bday pictures yet.. my sister boxed me out at the PC last night.. have loads of stuff to do actually...
1. scan bday pictures
2. make galler for home page
3. scan how-to macrame stuff for ate ging
4. make gallery for fan site (and update the paking site!)

....don't know when i'll be able to spare time to actually accomplish my list (priority: #3, #1, #2, #4)
...#4 is quite tasking 'cause i still haven't captured images from the vcd...

ay forgot to tell.. already watched Die Another Day.. in my opinion.. is the best James Bond movie i ever watched... was everything i expected a Bond film to be..

bye again!

hehehe.

birthday bash was a success! though some people weren't able to go.. (wapaks HS barkada) there were still plently of people to finish off the 3 cases of beer i bought.. my college friends were all there.. (hugs all of you).. my ex-officemates, chatmates, present officemates... even Ma'am Belle, (my boss and sis) went! but of course, i still wasn't lucky enough.. JUSKOPONG MERALCO YAN.. tama bang magbrownout!.. at first i was really, really pissed... but my guests weren't bothered that much.. (wahaha buti na lng, pero kabwiset parin).. good thing it was already past 1 am and it was already a little bit cold so they weren't too uncomfortable.. a lot of people got lost.. though officemate Chipper was the most-lost-at-the-mountains winner.. was MILES away from our house.. was beginning to get a liitle irritated at him when he kept on saying to me in his sarcastic, olats manner .. "great party, uh".. gaahh.. it WAS a great party.. to think we had no electricty.. but my friends are chatmates are good sports (unlike him-- party pooper) and they compensated with whatever we had.. which was of course, food and beer and people.. Bevs was playing at the piano all brownout-long with Irvie and Eugene belting out the "tunes".. chatmates formed their on circle and were just chatting all night.. though Nardo was always getting teased with people saying "Yeeeeeeee!" in the background.. LOL.. (you won't get the joke if you don't know his history, of course.. hehe)

the next morning... Irvie, Bevs, Roni, Eboy, Eugene were the ones left and we all went to our farm-liit at Paenaan.. was soooooo fun.. we had our "safari ride" (LOL).. had a fear factor test.. and went river tampisaw-ing.. hehe.. Eboy even said she's limping because of our so-called leap of faith.. hehe.. we had to jump between canals to go to the river.. irvie was the funniest 'cause she said she felt as if she stopped in mid-air and that if it wasn't for us pulling her to the other side, that she might have fallen.. LOL! too bad ria, harbie and anshe weren't there.. think they left at around 4 am..

... more good news.. ate's advance christmas gift is.. (pabulong) .. erhmm.. cool dudes vcd.. BWAHAHAHAHAH.. now i'll be able to finish my gallery.. no more excuses! lolz..

speaking of which.. better get started before i get lazy again....

bye all!