Tuesday, June 24, 2008

...elow daddy!

pangs came here for the weekend bearing tsugtsug gifts! the most important, and thankfully useful thing he brought was this Rocker Swing. The first time tsugtsug sat on it, he friggin fell asleep! as in! i couldn't believe it! i was jumping and hugging pangs when i saw those little eyes close! granted, it has yet to happen again, but i have faith! bwahaha. *positive thinking* he likes the swing a lot, he has slept on it for 45 minutes and when awake, he can stay for about 20. i know it doesn't seem much, but believe me, every minute of him being able to entertain himself is heaveeeen. i can actually write this blog! (he's currently on the swing)

here's tsugtsug sleeping on his new throne. the big hand's another gift.. the zaky!

nagulat ata si pangs kung gano na kalaki si tsugtsug ehehe. and he's not boring anymore ehehe. when pangs left tsugtsug would only cry and sleep.. now he stays awake for a couple of hours and smiles his gas off in a poopoo session..

meh milagrong ginagawa pag ngumingiti yan

who? me?

bilis din natuto ni pangs.. had to teach him how tsugtsug likes to be carried.. there's a science to the bounce-bounce dance ehehe.. he also learned that tsugtsug is a very smart baby.. he knows when there's a change in altitude lol. (read: he doesn't like you sitting down while holding him!)

and there will always be a photo session when his daddy is home:


what's up mommy?

anong kalokohan ito?

family portrait!

more pictures on his flickr site.

miss na namin ang daddy nya! (miss ka rin daw ni mommy, nakakatulog sya ng matagal eh hehe) his next visit is tsugtsug's binyag. can't wait!

Friday, June 13, 2008

...dead tired


i am so tired. both of my wrists hurt.. my joints are aching and i have this shooting spasm that hits me on my left hip..i have no idea what position causes it! nabibigla na lang ako sa painnnnnnn. i think my seldom-used muscles were challenged by tsugtsug. from his last checkup, he is now 9.9lbs! i don't know how i'll be able to carry him in the succeeding months.. maybe my arm muscles would grow bigger too? lol. carrying him is like having a total workout.. triceps, biceps.. pati muscles sa thigh, tapus cardio workout (when i try to rock him to sleep... imagine 30 minutes of walking, semi-jumping while carrying 5 kilos).

it's all worth it.. once i see his eyes closed and his mouth open. nyahahha.

good thing his daddy is visiting soon! yahooooooooooo! yey pangs! he'll be here on the 21st. don't forget my bilins nyahaha. i asked for more baby stuff.. hopefully, they won't turn into baby junk! hehe. in n@w, (newlyweds at work) i asked what baby purchases they regret and recommend.. turns out one's regret is another mother's recommendation.. so iba iba din. mga regret ko so far is yung crib.. but its still early, so hopefully he'll be able to use it once he is a bit bigger. (pang kulong ehehe) i asked pangs for a sling, some nursing blouses (i dunno where to buy here!) and an automated rocker.

tsugtsug's rashes are beginning to subside too! yey! i use cetaphil on his face.. and mustela dermo-cleansing gel on his body.. i really like the mustela products. its pricey, but its a big bottle and i only use a little.. so i'm pretty sure it'll last a couple of months. haaay, if i only knew, i should've used it from the very beginning. di gusto ni tsugtsug yung pigeon toiletries. sayang, mabango pa naman.

meh nabasa ako sa net yung 'how motherhood changed me'.. eto yung akin:
- i have a new hobby.. making cotton balls
- when constipated, i do a 'inhale-push-1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10-exhale'. works much better!
- i can finish(gulp) a meal in 5 minutes.
- i have a new skill.. i can tie a ribbon using only one hand. o-ha. (i tie a loose mitten while holding him)
- i changed from a no-cup to a B-cup!! bwahahaha.

sige, yun muna.. tulog muna ako habang tulog ang baby.


Friday, June 06, 2008

...now i know

motherhood brings about tons of realizations..

first is how friggin tough it is. i decided to room-in tsugtsug on my 2nd night at the hospital, despite the strong advice of my friends and cousins against it. it was definitely hard, being responsible for the little one so soon after giving birth.. i still had painful uterine contractions, and my stitches were definitely hurting.. i think my argument then was, at least we're in the hospital where help was just a buzz away. thinking back, i'm not positive if i would've done the same thing. it was just too much responsibility, too fast! i couldn't rest at all, same for my mom and pangs. but i believe it really helped us to gain confidence as first time parents.. how to carry tsugtsug, change nappies, then a midwife showed us how to bathe him.. and most importantly was the breastfeeding. we (tsugtsug and me) were able to practice our latching.. latching is definitely the hardest part in breastfeeding.. being with him in his first few days where he didn't need that much food yet, i didn't feel any pressure at all that i was starving him. i can't imagine doing it for the first time at home! i remember during the first week, i was trying to pump milk but there was just so little.. then i stood up and left the bottle with the pump on the rocking chair.. when i got back, the milk leaked thru the bottle and 3/4s was gone.. i cried and cried and raymond and my mom had to calm me down.. i was just so friggin exhausted and frustrated then..what came to my mind though was "it's no use crying over spilled milk".. LITERALLY. then i calmed down a bit. hehehe.

another realization is.. i'm so glad i've read and researched about childcare and breastfeeding. there's just too much varying opinions from the oldies! you wouldn't believe how formula advocates the oldies are. lol. as in. they could become med reps for milk companies. tsugtsug was weighed on his 10th day and he lost a pound and everyone was like "WHAT? WHY? GINUGUTOM MO!" i honestly wasn't worried because i've read that babies do lose some birth weight on his first two weeks (especially breastfed babies) but i was beginning to get paranoid too with everyone clamoring for formula! i gave in eventually, but he only gets formula about once/twice a day when he cries in the middle of feeding for no apparent reason. (sometimes, napupupu lang pala! naiiyak sa pag iire nya). anyway, it's not just the formula.. they have opinion about everything from pacifiers to giving water to using bigkis! but good thing about my mom, she reads the books i show her so there are less arguments.

first 2 weeks, raymond, my mom and myself were taking care of the baby and we were all so sleep deprived. we were staying at our house where there was no cable tv, we had to make do with the shitty tv reception. sobrang walang tulog i was able to watch from unang hirit to dramarama to telebabad to the station sign off. pag 1:30 am i would look at tsugtsug and say.. now what? lol! also, while watching dyesebel (we can only get channel 2 and 7), there was a dialogue na "anong ginawa nila sa mukha mo dyesebel?" the 3 of us were like "huh? bakit? ano nga ginawa sa mukha eh pareho lang?". we couldn't see that half her face had scars because of the snowy reception nyahaha. (tapus black and white lang! minsan nagiging colored pag natatamaan ng electric fan ata hahaha) later on, we would watch dvds from 1-5 (twilight hour) then raymond would jump up and down in the middle of a movie and say "2:00 am pa lang!!!!". I remember Ate lala's song to us "Kay tagal, ng umagaaaaaaaaa" hehe. it sure felt like that every single day. There were times I wanted to quit breastfeeding because it felt so unfair.. everyone else was asleep (including tsugtsug..human pacifier ako nyan eh!) whereas I was trying to stay awake in fear of smothering tsugtsug with my boob. (urban legend lang ba yun?)

now that tsugtsug is a month old, i have more or less adjusted to his moods.. and to his schedule..from 1-6,i can usually sleep 4 hours.. we're 1 hour awake when i'm nursing.. i still can't put him down on his crib to sleep (what a waste of money!) but as long as he sleeps on my chest, he can sleep for 3 hours straight.. on afternoons its a different story.. sometimes he cries so much for no apparent reason it drives me nuts! just like today, minsan sinasabayan ko sya ng iyak hahaha. kaloka. i worry why he hasn't pooped, i worry if i'm starving him.. i worry about his rashes in his face and on his chest and on his neck... dati binibilang ko pa! lol! wawa eh, ang dami huhuhu.

i've also realized how much crap i've bought for tsugtsug.. the crib sucks! lol. i should've bought the one with a real bassinet (the round one) cause he seems to be lost in the hugeness of the bassinet we bought for him.. now i bought a separate bassinet which he barely uses as well.. oh well.. i'm still hoping he'll use it sooner or later..

last but definitely not the least realization.. that this little person is completely dependent on me.. its so scary!

tomorrow's his checkup. i'm excited to know how much he weighs now. my wrists hurt so much from carrying him, feels like i have permanent carpal tunnel syndrome.

yun muna.. 2 weeks in the making ang post na toh hehe. bye for now.

Monday, June 02, 2008

...tsugtsug is 1 month old!


you can't see it but inside tsugtsug's mittens is his peace sign too!