i've been reading this book, toddler 411 by Denise Fields and Ari Brown and it has helped me in so many ways of how i deal with tsugtsug and his terrible twos phase..
first off, was in disciplining him.. okay, i admit it.. i don't. haha. he has become a brat and it is very much my fault. its just easier to just give in and let him get away with stuff. what i've done mostly is to remove whatever it is that's usually causing the tantrums. gavin's tantrum's can be categorized as such:
1. holding/climbing stuff he shouldn't be holding <--solution: just put it out of sight/childproofing
2. changes in routine <-- solution: don't change. lol.
3. not eating <--solution: TV. big LOL.
4. asking for the moon (read: unreasonable stuff) <-- solution: No means NO!)
with number 1, it has been trickier to follow since i've been living in my parent's house for the last 3 months.. what with my dad leaving his toolbox open, leaving the stapler on the table, etc. so what my solution was to disclipline my DAD, not tsugtsug. lol.
with number 2, this is one trick i've learned from the book that has helped me SOOO much. it's so simple, i don't know why i haven't tried it before. the book explains how toddler's tantrums usually start because of a change in what they're doing.. example.. they're playing then it's time to eat.. or they're watching tv then it'll be time for a nap, etc.. so what i do now is i set a kitchen timer, and tell tsugtsug that when it's time for him to take a nap/bedtime that he has 5 minutes to play and when the bell rings, it's time to take a nap/go upstairs (to start his bedtime routine). kids don't know what "5 minutes" mean so by having a timer and waiting for the bell, they'll have a firmer grasp on the concept of "time". it has worked WONDERS for me. tsug will even say "where is the bell? 5 minutes?" and i'll say "let's wait for the bell before we go up". no more pushing and pulling when its time for his nap/bedtime. as soon as the bell rings, he would jump up and go with me quickly! amazing.
with number 3, i'm just too lazy to change it. lol. i have just accepted the fact that tsugtsug is not interested in food. he is a very picky eater. i could count on my hand the food he eats. cheese, corn, rice, yogurt milk, breakfast cereals, raisins, cake, ice cream, peanut butter and Oreo. ooh, i'm sorry. Big oreo. PINK big oreo, not anything else. those are just the food he would eat on his own. if it's not in the list, i should have TV or his Ipod prepared. or anything (crayons, paper, toys) that would make him distracted enough for him to open his mouth while i stuff him with the protein he needs. (pork giniling, egg, sinampalukan, tinola, etc) Latest craze for him is Artzooka, this art show in Nickelodeon. i have recorded it for my sanity.
with number 4, i just let him cry it out. the book says just be firm. AND consistent. if you allowed it one time, it'll be harder to discipline him the next. so i just become the evil strict mother who walks away. EVEN in public tantrums. hehe. i don't care if i get mean looks. i'm sure the other mothers can relate. the book says in public tantrums, just make a quick getaway. LOL. i told pangs this and we're like Masters at this already. We order dessert at the START of a meal if we want to have any. and we can eat at restaurants in less than 30 minutes. (literally eat and run)
the stricter version of myself has reaped tiny benefits already. tsug doesn't push binog's swing that hard anymore. he'll be like "look mommy, slow" and i would praise him while holding my breath and praying "please don't drop your baby brother". sometimes i could even make him whisper to me while his baby brother is sleeping. *silent clap*. so No means No for tsug. I just have to remember which stuff the NOs pertain to. sometimes i forget, and tsug gets confused too harhar. (no throwing of sand? or is that in the "let go" list)
also, tsug's toilet training. it says in the book, if he's not ready, he's just not. if he poops on his pants and still continues playing, he's not ready. so tsug isn't. at least he says "wiwi" on his own now.. the books says if you're the one who makes him go to the potty every couple of hours then YOU're the one toilet trained, not him. score one for tsugtsug! hehe. i remember my cousin telling me to have tsugtsug tested or something, to check if he is "gifted" or something. (with his advanced reading skills etc) and i'm like.. no,. i don't think he's gifted. he poops while standing up for gawd's sake. lol. so tsug, no one goes to accelerated class with poopie in his pants.